Corrupted

I saw a post on the internet at about 9:45 this morning, and since then I've read it more times than I can count. The words resonated with me throughout my day hitting me in deeper and deeper places. I debated back and forth for hours today about whether or not I should write a blog about what I read or share the post on my social media. I know not everyone will respond to it well, and I know some people may say it's inappropriate. Others may shrink back in guilt or say that its tasteless or offensive. I was afraid that others would take it as an attack or condemn themselves because of it, and I'm hoping that nobody responds like that.  But no matter how people choose to respond, this post speaks - no, screams - something that we need to hear and remember and write on our hearts.

So here's the post that I read:

"'What will it be like the first time I see a woman naked?'

'The first time you see a woman naked will not be like you imagined. There will be no love, no trust, no intimacy. You won't even be in the same room as her.

You won't get to smile as she undresses you and you undress her. You won't get to calm her nerves with nerves of your own. You won't get to kiss her, feeling her lips and the edge of her tongue. You won't get to brush your fingers along the lace of her bra or count her ribs or feel her heartbeat. 

The first time you see a woman naked you will be in front of a computer screen watching somebody play at intimacy and perform at sex. She will contort her body to please everybody in the room but her. You will watch this woman who is not a woman, pixelated and filtered and customized. She will come ready-made, like an order in a restaurant. The man on the screen will be bigger than you, rougher than you. He will teach you how to talk to her. He will teach you where to put your hands and he will teach you what you're supposed to like. He will teach you to take what's yours.'

'You must unlearn this. You must unlearn this twisted sense of love. You must unlearn this definition of pleasure and intimacy you are being taught. Kill this idea of love, this idea of entitlement, this way of scarring each other.'" 

There's so much that I want to say, but at the same time I feel like this post says it all.  I read this today shaking and sad and angry because we have been corrupted. Some of us have been corrupted by choice, others by chance and still others by force. Nonetheless, we walk through a world where movies, comic books, advertisements, music and magazines are pushing rotted and corrupted views of  sex and intimacy and love into our eyes and minds and hearts day after day. Everything is overexposed and loud, causing a devastating cycle of fear and compromise and comparison and pain.

We need to recognize the extent of what we've been taught by this daily onslaught. As the post said, the people on the screen will teach you how to talk, how to touch, and what to like. If we don't remain aware that we're being fed a revolting, sickening, cheap, shallow, empty and dirty mimicry of love, we'll fall for it. 

But we can take it back. We can take true love back - one relationship at a time, one touch at a time, one day at a time. We can choose to unlearn the grimy, fake lessons of lust. We can choose to reject falsity and pursue true intimacy. I believe that despite what we've suffered or chosen, we can be restored and made new. I believe in a God who redeems and who delights in healing. I believe in a God who delights in taking what was broken and dirty and making it whole and clean. With His help, we can enter relationships and marriages with minds that have been renewed and cleansed by God's love and word. We need to learn His love and His way, or else our broken minds will only perpetuate the sick cycle of dirty love that society has us spinning in.

I believe in love that is patient and kind, that is gentle and pure, that doesn't delight in evil, that protects and endures. I believe that if we chase that kind of love and devote ourselves to protecting ourselves from anything less, we will experience and perpetuate the kind of intimacy that God intended for us to experience. For the sake of your heart, for the sake of your mind, for the sake of the one you love, for the sake of your marriage, for the sake of your sons and daughters...unlearn the lie. 

If we don't confront falsity we'll become it.